chris and i have been talking about kids a lot lately. how we would want to parent, where we want to raise our children, the things we do and don't want them to have... and this morning's events kicked off another long discussion.
we were at mass and one couple we know (the dad is the pianist and organist) adopted 2 little boys in the last few years. beautiful, funny, very difficult little boys. the mom is so patient but i have say also frazzled. the boys are around 2 and 4, i believe. they were having a tough time sitting still and "behaving". dad was playing the organ for the church while mom had one hand around the ankle of the oldest as he was crawling down the pew to the other end (without, i might add, his pants and shoes on) and the other around the youngest as he was desperately trying to exit the pew all together. people were immediately drawn into 2 groups. those you saw smiling at the boys thought it was mildly amusing while others were visibly tense, annoyed at the distraction from their "holy" time with g-d. to those i say, what's holy if not children?
to the others, the people who simply smiled at the children and pitied the mother (i was in this camp), i say, what is wrong with us? dad is serving us at mass, mom is obviously trying to keep the boys quiet so as not to disturb anyone and we sit by and smile? i can only imagine how tired mom must be and how helpful someone sitting with them at church to help watch the boys would be. for some reason we try to ignore when someone is embarrassed or having difficulty, i suppose to spare them shame. but i had to ask myself, even in this small way, are we being the church? are single people, married people, those with children and without getting and giving the care they need?
it makes me nervous and shy but i think i will ask mom if i can sit with them to help carry the load next week.
has anyone ever seen Supernanny?