the rite of reconciliation

for me, holy week began friday night with the rite of reconciliation. now, i grew up with the idea that confession, certainly planned confession with a priest, was silly, useless, even wrong, but this simple, profound practice in our church has come to mean a great deal to me. i love that father michael tells us that the most important, the most difficult job, of a priest is to communicate, not judgement or even absolution, but how much God loves us and the depth of God's forgiveness. confession in all it's forms, to God, to friends, to ourselves, to our pastor or priest, seems like a good idea to me.

i wanted to share a reflection someone read at the service.

Forgive us for not knowing or not wanting to know.
Forgive me Jesus for not fully knowing your humanity. I saw that like a brother, you wept in the arms of Mary and Martha. Forgive me for not knowing you needed companionship, needed love.

Forgive me for not seeing the fullness of humanity in the prostitute that walks the streets of Broadway, or the men who hover around the liquor store or in front of our church and hopes for a dollar for this next drink or the lonely woman who needs another kind word or the people lying on park benches.

Forgive me for not seeing they hurt, this is their crucifixion. Forgive me for avoiding eye contact with them, for parking in a different place or walking on the other side of the street.

Give me courage Mother/Father god for face to face reconciliation—forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.
Give our beloved community, Divine One courage to forgive.

Courage to forgive the little things: How has disappointment, a slight, a thoughtlessness, an angry word nestled into your heart and hardening your heart to tenderness and joy of the God Presence in the Other?
Give us courage Mother/Father god for face to face reconciliation—forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.

and more deeply...

What wounds do I carry that I have not forgiven?

I have been told a lie. I believed a lie. I believed that god is a man. –our father.
I have been told that I am created in the image and likeness of God. But god is a man. I could not have been totally created in the image and likeness of god.

And I am reminded daily that I have a different value as a women. We cannot bless the Eucharist because we are different, we cannot fully participate in the sacraments because we are different, we cannot be a part of leadership in our church because we are different.
There is something inherently wrong with me. I have this cloud of guilt and shame that I am not good enough

I cry out to you Mother/Father Divine give me the courage to awaken from these lies of self-negation. And forgive, for only in forgiving can I rise above the guilt and shame to speak truth to power.

I have been told lies about my body. It is not thin enough, it is not pretty enough, it is not young enough, it is too seductive, it is too masculine. As women, we are measured by the amount of children we have, by the amount of children we do not have, we are the ones that have the abortions, and we are the ones who "bring rape on ourselves".

I cry out to you Mother/Father Divine me the courage to awaken from these lies, give me a deepening appreciation of the Feminine Divine, the power to create, the powerful gift of giving. So that I may have burning zeal care for your creation.